Generated Title: Denied Access? More Like Denied Sanity.
So, I tried to access a page, right? And got hit with the classic "Access to this page has been denied because we believe you are using automation tools to browse the website." Give me a break. Automation tools? I'm just trying to read the damn page!
The JavaScript Conspiracy
The first excuse they throw at you is JavaScript. "Javascript is disabled or blocked by an extension (ad blockers for example)." Oh, okay, so now I'm being punished for trying to block the 800 trackers that are probably trying to steal my data? Maybe if websites weren't so invasive, people wouldn't need ad blockers in the first place. It's like blaming the victim for installing a security system after they've been robbed.
But wait...are we really supposed to disable our security measures just to access a website? What kind of backwards logic is that?
And the ad blocker thing...let's be real. Most people don't even know they have an ad blocker. So, are they just screwed?
Cookie Crumble
Then comes the cookie nonsense. "Your browser does not support cookies." Seriously? Who's running a browser that doesn't support cookies in this day and age? Maybe someone using Lynx on a 28.8k modem? This ain't 1995, people.
Offcourse, it's always possible that I accidentally disabled cookies somehow. But the implication is that if you don't let them track your every move, you're not worthy of viewing their precious content. It's digital feudalism, plain and simple.
And what if I choose not to support cookies? Am I now a second-class internet citizen?
The Reference ID Rabbit Hole
The whole thing ends with a cryptic "Reference ID: #33b6a048-b92b-11f0-9a34-56af0e6a1845." Like that means anything to me. What am I supposed to do with that? Call tech support and recite it like some kind of magic incantation? "Oh, great and powerful tech wizard, my Reference ID is #33b6a048-b92b-11f0-9a34-56af0e6a1845. Please grant me access to your sacred website!"
It's just a way for them to track you, not help you.
It reminds me of that time I tried to return a defective toaster. They wanted the serial number, the date of purchase, a blood sample... you'd think I was trying to steal the crown jewels.
The Illusion of Control
"Please make sure that Javascript and cookies are enabled on your browser and that you are not blocking them from loading." The passive aggression is palpable. It's like they're saying, "Please surrender your privacy and security for our convenience."
They expect us to believe this nonsense, and honestly...it's exhausting. Fighting for every scrap of digital autonomy. It's like trying to hold back the tide with a spoon.
